This month I had to travel and like any other time I had to do so I thought nothing of it. I made my way on the airplane sat down and realized that with the noise on the plane I couldn't hear anything. As I sat there I thought back to when the doctor told me how I would live a normal life. The entire flight I thought about how much things have changed for me.
For one, I now set the alarm clock loud enough to wake up the whole house.Why? Cause if I happen to roll over and cover my good ear I can't hear the alarm. Sorry honey! Meetings tend to be an audio nightmare. Two or more people talking at one time has become a challenge. Whenever we go out to eat I find myself missing most of the conversations. I know my wife and kids try not to show their frustration. But I know they get tired of having to repeat themselves.
I told myself when this first started that I wouldn't be that guy. You know! The "What was that?" guy. Man I even hate the sound of that. I rather miss what was said then be that guy. I'm still trying to find my way through all of this. Listening to the world around me has taken on new efforts. I realize that people around me don't have to change for me. I have to change how I interact with my environment.
I wish I had a volume button I could use to turn things up or down. Wouldn't that be simple.
Wednesday, April 27, 2011
Thursday, April 14, 2011
Living a Normal Life with Sudden Hearing Loss>
The last thing the ENT Doctor said to me was "You'll live a normal life". LIVE A NORMAL LIFE? Let me tell you," There is nothing normal about living with sudden hearing loss"! As a parent with young kids I always looked forward to a little moment of silence in my day. Today there is nothing that I hate more then silence. Silence has become a constant reminder of what happened to me.
The constant ringing in my ear is monumental and nothing short of maddening. It takes every effort to concentrate on any task little as it may be. In the beginning, sleeping was a task. So much so that I stayed awake as long as I could so I could pass out. Let's not forget the whole vertigo situation. Every time I laid down it felt as though I was rolling down a hill. What's normal about any of that?
When all of this first happened I took a few days off from work.The first day I returned was a struggle and a learning experience. That day helped shape my train of thought as to how I would tackle my condition going forward. I remember getting to work and trying to go about my day as though nothing had happened. Or so I thought.
Through out the day my coworkers would comment that they heard a ringing when near me. I instinctively always checked my phone and went about my business.This happened all day long and each time I checked my phone found nothing and went about the day. I finished the day and went to my car. Once in the car, I place my left hand on the steering wheel and was about to start the car with my right. When in the silence of the car, I heard it. I finally heard the ringing.
Apparently, I had set the alarm on my watch to testing mode!!!Therefor it was ringing all day. I immediately busted into laughter and thought "I'M OFFICIALLY HANDICAP"!!!!!!!
The constant ringing in my ear is monumental and nothing short of maddening. It takes every effort to concentrate on any task little as it may be. In the beginning, sleeping was a task. So much so that I stayed awake as long as I could so I could pass out. Let's not forget the whole vertigo situation. Every time I laid down it felt as though I was rolling down a hill. What's normal about any of that?
When all of this first happened I took a few days off from work.The first day I returned was a struggle and a learning experience. That day helped shape my train of thought as to how I would tackle my condition going forward. I remember getting to work and trying to go about my day as though nothing had happened. Or so I thought.
Through out the day my coworkers would comment that they heard a ringing when near me. I instinctively always checked my phone and went about my business.This happened all day long and each time I checked my phone found nothing and went about the day. I finished the day and went to my car. Once in the car, I place my left hand on the steering wheel and was about to start the car with my right. When in the silence of the car, I heard it. I finally heard the ringing.
Apparently, I had set the alarm on my watch to testing mode!!!Therefor it was ringing all day. I immediately busted into laughter and thought "I'M OFFICIALLY HANDICAP"!!!!!!!
Thursday, April 7, 2011
How did it happen?
September 9, 2010 is a date I will remember just as easy as I can remember my own birthday. This is the day I lost all hearing in my left ear. I remember getting up that morning and forcing myself to maw the lawn. Everything was fine. I finished and took a shower. While I was showering I got a loud buzzing sound in my ear.A buzzing sound that to this day is just as loud without any interuption. By the time I got out of the shower I realized that I couldn't hear from my left ear. I thought I had gotten water in my ear. I went to work the next day and realized that it had to be something other than water in my ear.
After work the next day I went to a local walkin clinic and saw a doctor. He examined me and asked a few questions. He asked if I had had a cold or the flu. Which I had not. Looking back on that visit I now realize that the doctor knew what had happened to me. I should have realized from the doctor's mannerisms that he wasn't telling me what I needed to know. What he did tell me was that I should see a specialist an ENT doctor. In the mean time he gave me some medicines to take. Medicines which I later found out had no positive or negative effect on my situation.
It took a week for me to get an appointment with a local ENT doctor. At the time, the buzzing sound in my ear continued and was just as loud with no improvement in my hearing. The doctor examined me and told me that I had Sudden Hearing Loss. I asked what this meant. He said that I must have gotten a virus which attacked my in ear and caused my hearing loss. He said that what was certain was that this condition would be permanent. PERMANENT!
How could this happen? How did it happen? What do you mean permanent? All these thoughts rushed into my head all at once. I don't think that I registered anything the doctor said after he said "PERMANENT". My wife, who I could recognize was in shock, filled in the blanks later.
The doctor did explain that I could get an injection of steroids straight into my inner ear. He explained that steroids had shown to help recovery in some patients. Of course there was no guarantee. Let me tell you, that shot hurt! I asked about the buzzing in my ear. He explained that this condition was called Tinnitus. Tinnitus- a ringing or similar sensation of sound in the ears. I then asked how long this would last. His response was that I would eventually get use to it and that it could suddenly stop or be a permanent condition. He also went on to say that vertigo could also have an effect on me. Which to this point I did not feel any dizziness.
In the end, the steroids had no effect on my condition. I looked up whatever I could about this condition and realized that doctors really don't know why it occurs. It does occur most in people over the age of 30. I'm still searching for articles. But the more I read the less I believe doctors know what they're dealing with and most important how to deal with it.
Two more weeks passed and my wife thought that I should see my primary physician. I have to say that he turned out to be a great doctor. Not for any other reason other than he was understanding of my situation. I say this because the ENT doctor was as cold as he could be and lacked any empathy. Not that I was looking for some emotional conection. But some empathy would have gone a long way. The ENT doctor basicly told me that the condition was permanent and that I should lead a normal life. Really?
I know my primary physician read up on my condition in order offered his opinion. Which, he stated was not as informative as he wanted it to be. He didn't have to say it out loud; but, I knew that not much is known as to what the causes are and how to treat it. He did suggest that I have an MRI of the left ear done.
The MRI turned out to be another mile-stone for me. As I lay there, there was nothing more that I want than to hear the machine from both of my ears. Of course "PERMANENT" was the reality. The MRI was a significant moment because the minute I got up I went Vertigo. The first thought in my mind was "AND THERE IT IS". This is a favorite phrase that my wife uses for those special moments of enlightenment. I now had all the side affects that I could have with my condition. Sudden Hearing Loss, Tinnitus, and Vertigo!
After work the next day I went to a local walkin clinic and saw a doctor. He examined me and asked a few questions. He asked if I had had a cold or the flu. Which I had not. Looking back on that visit I now realize that the doctor knew what had happened to me. I should have realized from the doctor's mannerisms that he wasn't telling me what I needed to know. What he did tell me was that I should see a specialist an ENT doctor. In the mean time he gave me some medicines to take. Medicines which I later found out had no positive or negative effect on my situation.
It took a week for me to get an appointment with a local ENT doctor. At the time, the buzzing sound in my ear continued and was just as loud with no improvement in my hearing. The doctor examined me and told me that I had Sudden Hearing Loss. I asked what this meant. He said that I must have gotten a virus which attacked my in ear and caused my hearing loss. He said that what was certain was that this condition would be permanent. PERMANENT!
How could this happen? How did it happen? What do you mean permanent? All these thoughts rushed into my head all at once. I don't think that I registered anything the doctor said after he said "PERMANENT". My wife, who I could recognize was in shock, filled in the blanks later.
The doctor did explain that I could get an injection of steroids straight into my inner ear. He explained that steroids had shown to help recovery in some patients. Of course there was no guarantee. Let me tell you, that shot hurt! I asked about the buzzing in my ear. He explained that this condition was called Tinnitus. Tinnitus- a ringing or similar sensation of sound in the ears. I then asked how long this would last. His response was that I would eventually get use to it and that it could suddenly stop or be a permanent condition. He also went on to say that vertigo could also have an effect on me. Which to this point I did not feel any dizziness.
In the end, the steroids had no effect on my condition. I looked up whatever I could about this condition and realized that doctors really don't know why it occurs. It does occur most in people over the age of 30. I'm still searching for articles. But the more I read the less I believe doctors know what they're dealing with and most important how to deal with it.
Two more weeks passed and my wife thought that I should see my primary physician. I have to say that he turned out to be a great doctor. Not for any other reason other than he was understanding of my situation. I say this because the ENT doctor was as cold as he could be and lacked any empathy. Not that I was looking for some emotional conection. But some empathy would have gone a long way. The ENT doctor basicly told me that the condition was permanent and that I should lead a normal life. Really?
I know my primary physician read up on my condition in order offered his opinion. Which, he stated was not as informative as he wanted it to be. He didn't have to say it out loud; but, I knew that not much is known as to what the causes are and how to treat it. He did suggest that I have an MRI of the left ear done.
The MRI turned out to be another mile-stone for me. As I lay there, there was nothing more that I want than to hear the machine from both of my ears. Of course "PERMANENT" was the reality. The MRI was a significant moment because the minute I got up I went Vertigo. The first thought in my mind was "AND THERE IT IS". This is a favorite phrase that my wife uses for those special moments of enlightenment. I now had all the side affects that I could have with my condition. Sudden Hearing Loss, Tinnitus, and Vertigo!
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